Resolving conflict at work

Picture 1: Conflict at work

YOU can't win a conflict at work. Winning a conflict means getting the outcome `you' want regardless of what the `other' person wants. Since the underlying issue has not been solved, it will simply reappear later.

Much better than winning a conflict at work is resolving it. Unresolved conflicts make people unhappy at work and can result in antagonism, break-down in communications, inefficient teams, stress, and low productivity.

Here are essential steps to constructively resolve conflicts at work.

* Realize that some conflicts are inevitable at work. Whenever people are committed and fired up, or change, and new ideas are emerging, conflicts and disagreements are bound to happen. This doesn't mean you have to revel in conflict or create trouble just because it happens, but it means when conflict happens; it is not the end of the world. It can be the beginning of an interesting learning process. Conflicts mean that people care enough to disagree strongly. The trick is not to allow the conflict to go on forever.

* Handle conflicts sooner rather than later. Resolve a conflict when it starts, as it only gets worse with time. Conflicts at work arise not from something that was said, but from something that wasn't said! Everyone's waiting for the other to admit he is wrong, and gets more unpleasant after the conflict has stewed for a while. It is essential to interrupt the "waiting game" before it gets to that point.

* Ask nicely. If somebody has done something that made you angry, or if you don't understand their viewpoint or actions, simply asking about it can make a world of difference. Never assume that people do what they do to annoy or spite you. Sometimes there is good reason why that person does what he or she does (even the things that really get on your nerves), and a potential conflict evaporates right there. Make your inquiry just that - an inquiry, not an accusation of any sort: "I was wondering why you did `X' yesterday" or "I've noticed that you often do `Y'. Why is that?," are good examples. "Why do you always have to do `Z'!" is less constructive.

* Invite the other person to talk about the situation. A hurried conversation at your desk between e-mails and phone calls won't solve anything. You need an undisturbed location and time to address the issue.

*  Observe. Identify what you see in neutral, objective terms. This is where you describe the facts of the situation as objectively as possible. What is actually happening? When and how is it happening? What is the other person doing, and not least, what are you doing? You are only allowed to cite observable facts and not allowed to assume or guess at what the other person is thinking or doing. You can say, "I have noticed that you are always criticizing me at our meetings" because that is a verifiable fact. You can't say, "I have noticed that you have stopped respecting my ideas" because that assumes something about the other person.

* Apologies. Apologise for your part in the conflict. Usually everyone involved has done something to create and sustain the conflict. Remember: You are not accepting the entire blame, you are taking responsibility for your contribution to the situation.

* Appreciate. Praise the other part in the conflict. Tell them why it is worth it to you to solve the conflict. This can be difficult as few people find it easy to praise and appreciate a person they disagree strongly with, but it is a great way to move forward.

Compiled by 1Klassifieds team
Credit to NSTP

HH love you all :)

Successful goal setting

NO MATTER who you are, there must be something you want to achieve in life. Maybe you want to be rich, have a good relationship with your loved ones, become a top student, drive a luxury car, or live in a big bungalow.

Whatever it is you want, goal setting is the key to help you achieve it.

Most people know what goal setting is and how it works. It is a process of writing your goals down but that is not the magic pill.

The key to successful goal setting is not just in setting your goals but what your do after that, like coming out with steps and strategies to help you reach your goals.

Many people fail to achieve their goals because they just write down their goals and hope it will materialise automatically.

If you are serious about achieving your goals follow these simple and powerful steps below and you are on your way :

1 Develop Strategies: Goals keep you on track and keep you focused. However, it is the strategies you take that will help you make your goals come true. Therefore, learn to develop strategies and action plan on how you can achieve your goals.

2 Take at least three action steps everyday after setting your goals: Nothing is going to happen without action. It is action that produces results. If you are not taking any action, your goals will never come true. Commit yourself to take at least three action steps to help you get closer towards your goals everyday.

3 Visualise and imagine the outcome after you have achieved your goals every night before going to sleep. Motivation is the key to keep you going and keep you motivated at all times.

4 Set Sub Goals: Make sure you set sub goals to reach your big goals. Take it one step at a time and be happy each time you reach a sub goal instead of being mad that you did not reach the big goal.

5 Surround Yourself: If your goal is not to give something up, but to obtain something, surround yourself with things that remind you of how or why you want to achieve this goal.

6 Tell The World: If you tell everyone you know at work, friends, people online, you have a large group of people to hold you accountable. It might not sound like the right reason, but sometimes you will be more likely to follow through with something if you don't want to look like a failure to others.

Always remember you are responsible for your own success. If you are not willing to take the necessary steps, you will never achieve what you want.

HH love you all :)

Credit to NST

Communication Style

TAKE some time to recognize how you communicate with those around you. Analyze and note down your speaking styles including tone, volume, and diction.

Identify problems, conflicts, or contradictions in how you communicate with others. These trouble areas will become the focus of your personal development and improvement.

When speaking, remember to move at a steady and appropriate pace, using pauses when needed, and enunciating words to avoid slurring. Focus on using appropriate volume and tone.

Identify opportunities to practice and look for avenues for feedback throughout the process. Self-monitoring and review is also helpful to grade your progress.

If you feel you need a helping hand, there are communication programmers and courses available.

A number of academic institutions or professional counselors and tutors offer courses and seminars that provide communication skills training.

Credit to 1Klassifieds Team, NST